Thanks to My Champion..

I come from a very creative and talented family. I have spent much my adult life running away from my artistic talent that is running through my veins. I have never been much for painting or drawing even though I can do both with some ease. I moved away from home six days after a graduated high school to begin crafting my matrix. There was no room on my matrix for my artistic side.

Little did I know my talent and passion for cakes started in high school when I made an Orange Chiffon Cake with Candied Violets for the Junior Miss Pageant and won the talent competition. Others girls danced and played piano-- I proudly announced I would demonstrate my baking talent. That was my talent. They initially looked at me in horror--she is not staying with in the mold. That cake laid the foundation that would be dormant for more than seven years.

I did not tap back into this talent until I made a cake for my husband's surprise birthday party. Chocolate on chocolate. It had chocolate shavings all over the top. It looked beautiful...little did any one know the chocolate shavings covered up imperfect gnache. A further attempt to make the cake look perfect. The true laughs came when my husband blew the candles out and chocolate shavings blew all over the me and his best friend standing by the cake. That cake started the path to another birthday cake for my husband with a golf theme-- small molded golf balls of white chocolate, green fondant grass and a putting green on top. The was the shining star of a wine tasting event we held at our house. That night, everyone kept saying why didn't I do this for other people, I tossed there comments to the side. Because I had a plan, a matrix. I would not even allow myself to accept there complements gracefully. "oh, its not a big deal." I could even say a simple thank you when someone complemented my food or cake.

It was later that weekend when my wonderful husband said I should follow my passion and see what happens. He was my support system. He helped me with a logo, he became my champion. My first client was in his network of friends. He never doubted me. Over the years my love for husband and daughter has changed why I do cakes...he is my champion and I am their champion. I do cakes because it makes me happy and it is something I love.

Cakes While Pregnant...

So I was pregnant... I had adjusted my matrix, but I now had letterhead because I had clients, yes clients. In addition to still being in the corporate world, I mean I had good benefits, I was on the management track, I now a small event business. I would plan the party, do the food, set up the food table and create the cake. One small wrinkle-- being pregnant. I was so sick my first 12 weeks-- I mean sick we should have purchased stock in Schwepps. But I kept going. I could do it. I am married to an amazing husband who watched me try and do it all. So at five months pregnant I took what would be my last official job before becoming a mom-- a baby shower. Simple, quiche, salad and a cake. Oh, what to do. Pink and green for a little girl, polka dots went with the theme. Looking back this is so boring and uninspired. The flavor was even boring-- they wanted chocolate, just plain chocolate. But that is what you are going to turn out when you use a template and your life is run by a matrix.

The one thing I wasn't counting on the hormones. I was still using my templates to create and design the cake so now my usual anal compulsiveness was mixed in with raging hormones and my poor husband did not dare cross the kitchen threshold. But he smiled and offered to help where he could. I delivered the cake and finished the shower-- many of the women at the shower looked at me in what I thought was amazement, as I proudly told them that I did this in addition to my full time corporate job, being happily married and pregnant, but it was really, you have know idea what you are getting into and try and keep this up. They were already moms. It was the secret mom code look. I now know the look. I have shared it with my own mom as we laugh about experiences of the uninitiated. That was first major turning point for me a simple polka dot at a baby shower. I had to let go of a dream--I couldn't do it all. That was my last full scale event for about two years. I lost myself in a sea of polka dots.

I Am on The Kiddie Circuit...

So cake number one went well so well I got another client out of it--albeit another princess cake, but, another cake. There has been one development between client one and client two. I found out I was pregnant. We were planning on having kids-- God just excellerated the time line. This was not in my plan-- this was six months early. I now had clients-- where did being pregnant 6 months early and having two clients fit into my life matrix that I was trying so desparately to follow--I would keep working my corporate job and do parties and make fabulous cakes. However, this was God's way prepping me for parenthood. What not to do at my own daughter's birthday parties- 75 adults 40 kids. Over the top-- storytellers, goodie bags, music, lights-- there might have well have been a fog machine.

But a stuck to my plan... my computer template. I submitted my sketch (I drew probably twenty) and they loved it. I used the same buttercream receipt-- but alternated chocolate and vanilla layers. A cinderella blue fondant with little slippers randomly placed-- but every slipper was intentional. I remember rotating the cake and asking my husband does it look okay--I am sure he was looking at me as if I was asking him "does the cake look fat?"

The client loved the cake and recommended me to girlfriend-- a kid's birthday cake. I was now officially on the kiddie circuit.

Before Baby

So there was some unfinished business around that first cake--it was before I became a mom. I approached cake design like corporate america-- a defined plan, controlled, and perfection was goal. I used my computer to design a tiered template of circles that a could draw my plan onto-- I could not even let go enough to free hand a couple of cake tiers-- God I was wound tight! Even though I had no idea what I was doing I would act like I did-- these people were paying me-- confidence brings calm but it also builds up a wall that you can hide behind when you need help. That was before baby. Look a that first cake-- I measured out the harlequin pattern with a ruler-- I drew out the plan on my computerized template.

That seems so long ago-- its hard to recognize me as a person or that cake designer. That first cake was a white cake with an italian buttercream-- I have moved on to swiss buttercream which on uses the egg whites not the whole egg and now white cake seems so boring. But that cake gave me my start. A place of reflection--oh but things have changed...

Things have changed-- its 5:16 am my daughter just walked out with swim goggles on her and her blanket- this is now my most treasured time.

The Start

So I finally did it. After years of making cakes for friends and family I letting my quiet talent out of the bag. When you first meet me I am, or at least I try, or should I say have tried to present myself as a pulled together mom, wife, corporate go to gal. However, this image has changed over the last few years. Early in life I was so focused on my career I did not allow myself to truly enjoy my role as a wife and mom or my talent.  Making cakes was just something I did and casually made comments like-- "oh, I just whipped this out." Now, I am still in the corporate world, but first and foremost I am a wife to an amazing man and mom to an amazing daughter. I have had the pleasure of making cakes and cupcakes for both.

Continuing to make cakes over the past few years has taught me grace- to loose my sense of perfectionism that has haunted me my entire life. Trust me, it still creeps up on me, but now I am making cakes because I enjoy the process, they are an expression of my artistic side given to me by my parents which I have spent the greater part of my adult life trying to snuff out. If my daughter comes wondering into the kitchen at 5:00 am-- yes we are both early risers and yes that is when I do my baking most of the time because I still do have my corporate job--and pokes her finger into the fondant which has happened more than once I know I can cover it-- a few years ago I would have yelled and given a time out. I know she just wants to help her mom.

My first cake was for a young family-- it represented so many firsts--- a little girl's first birthday, my first time working with fondant, my first time making a two tiered cake. Yes, a took a job never having opened a package of fondant or taking a formal cake class. The cake turned out fine, but looking back more than six years later, I see a cake the represents perfectionism by the harlequin pattern. They wanted a princess cake-- I would go so many other places now--however, not to bad for my first effort.