So Now What...

So now what? I spent the first year of my daughters life figuring out how to be a mom or what I thought was the "mom ideal." We had the SUV, the bugaboo (it was a great stroller if your kid has reflux-- you can keep them at a permanent angle-- thus reducing spit up and laundry loads), we had hair bows and we had the mega first birthday. I felt like we were making progress.

I was starting to loosen up as a mom. No really I was--I was laughing now--sometimes even at myself. Work was going well. Things were on track until New Years Eve. My daughter had her accident and we end up in the Grossman Burn Center ICU for 10 days and 2 surgeries. She would eventual need one additional surgery to repair the graft that was placed on her hand. That forever changed me as a mom. She is fully recovered from her burns and so are we-- but I did not do another cake that year. "Practical" quickly came into my vocabulary. For her birthday we did cupcakes. The matrix of perfection that I was trying to live my life by and build my cakes by was starting to crumble. I have a resilient little girl to thank for that. As parents we are here to teach our children life's lessons, but in the 5 1/2 years my daughter has been on the planet I have learned so many lessons from her.

People kept asking "are you still doing parties, have you done a cake?" I would respond, "no, focusing on being a mom." I just wasn't inspired. The next cake I would do, is still to this day, one of my most favorite. The cake I came out of hiatus for was for a family member. My cousin, but I call her my Aunt. She is more than that, she has been my guardian, a mentor, a picture of grace. It was my first cake truly drawn on inspiration. She loves violets. I designed the cake without a template. It was a white cake with lemon curd and fresh raspberries with a vanilla buttercream. It was covered in white fondant with purple violets. They were randomly placed all over the cake. I still love the simple elegance of the cake.

To transport the cake I bought a cake box-- it looked very professional. I remember sitting around the table watching everyone eat the cake. Silently watching expressions. This was family after all. They will tell you like it is. But they loved it. Success.